Bad Seed: A Christmas Story vs The Good Son

A Christmas Story vs The Good Son

In honor of the holiday season, I talk about two terrible little blonde boys on a single-minded quest to get what they want no matter who or what gets in their way — it’s A Christmas Story vs The Good Son.

I also posit my theories about an alternate universe where Ralphie is Macaulay Culkin and uses his Red Ryder BB gun for evil.

Ancient History: Jurassic Park vs The Mummy (1999)

Jurassic Park vs The Mummy

When it comes to people going too far in their pursuit of knowledge (and money) leading to ancient predators being unleashed upon the world that they need to then stop, Jurassic Park is nowhere near as good as The Mummy (1999, obviously). I tear into Jurassic Park much how a dinosaur should have torn into Dr. Hammond's awful grandchildren. 

If you want to read the fantastic GQ Brendan Fraser article I reference, you can find it here: Whatever Happened to Brendan Fraser? by Zach Baron.

Somebody to Love: (500) Days of Summer vs Tiptoes

500 Days of Summer vs Tiptoes

This week’s comparison features 2 unexpected and quirky love stories that don't follow the typical Hollywood formula — it's (500) Days of Summer vs Tiptoes. I explain why Summer was in the right, prove my undying love for Kate Beckinsale, and I beg listeners to help me find the extended cut of Tiptoes.

All in the Family: August: Osage County vs Home for the Holidays

August Osage County vs Home for the Holidays

Instead of fighting with someone in your own family, watch fake families fight each other for your entertainment this holiday season! I get into the highly dysfunctional families of August: Osage County and Home for the Holidays and explain why I watch Queen Holly Hunter in Home for the Holidays every single Thanksgiving.

May-December: The Graduate vs Adore

The Graduate vs Adore

This week’s episode features two movies focusing on a May-December romance with hot older ladies and whiny young boys — it’s The Graduate vs Adore. I have a LOT to say about both and if I can get even one person to watch Adore, I’ll feel I’ve done my part.

The Nice Guys: Forrest Gump vs Blast from the Past

Forrest Gump vs Blast from the Past

This week, I’m talking about 2 movies featuring a kind but naive protagonist who sails through life without a care in the world as absolutely absurd things happen around him and also he gets a hot blonde girlfriend — it’s Forrest Gump vs Blast from the Past.

Toil and Trouble: Hocus Pocus vs Halloweentown

Hocus Pocus vs Halloweentown

In honor of Halloween, I’m talking about two groups of PG Disney witches — it’s Hocus Pocus vs Halloweentown. I’m hoping all the Halloweentown fans come out of the woodwork to talk to me about Debbie Reynolds, Judith Hoag’s denim jacket, and why we can all still remember Sophie’s spell. I also defend Sarah Jessica Parker and explain why Vinessa Shaw is the best part of Hocus Pocus.

Price of Fame: A Star is Born vs Country Strong

A Star is Born 2018 vs Country Strong

Enjoy my rageful comparison of 2 movies about aging country singers with substance abuse problems, the hot young star they take under their wing, and the price of fame — it’s A Star is Born vs Country Strong. Spoiler alert: I HATED A Star is Born. I love the legend known as Gwyneth Paltrow. I welcome arguments about my opinions, I’m ready and raring to go in defending my Bradley Cooper rage.